Vol. II · No. 156
Established 2025

smallweb

Friday, June 5, 2026
160 writers in the library
Tech · 1 shelves
Tech

Scott Smitelli.

Articles and projects on programming, software, and creative tech experiments.

Recent essays

25 of 25

You don't have to if you don't want to.

“In the year 5555, your arms are hangin’ limp at your sides, your legs got nothing to do, some machine doin’ that for you.” Zager and Evans sang these words in 1969. Now, thirty-five centuries ahead of schedule, it’s never been easier to tell the world “I didn…

Altoids by the Fistful

“In evolution, a maladaptation is a trait that is (or has become) more harmful than helpful, in contrast with an adaptation, which is more helpful than harmful.” I went to Wikipedia to look that up, not a large language model. More »

If it cites em dashes as proof, it came from a tool.

It’s a safe bet that most of us have encountered the age-old admonition to “never judge a book by its cover” at some point in our lives. There is a deep wisdom in that advice—wisdom that seems to go completely out the window as soon as a certain type of person…

Et tu, Panera?

Toasted Frontega Chicken sandwich, no sliced tomatoes. There’s that feeling again, why are my teeth clenched? And a cup of Mac & Cheese. I remember getting locked out of my online loan servicing account a few years ago, that sucked. And a regular Dr Pepper. Ho…

Shut Up and Dance

A human interest piece about a person who never existed, who has spent his entire adult life doing something I don’t know anything about. More »

Take This On-Call Rotation and Shove It

At some companies, it is expected that certain engineers will serve as part of a formal on-call rotation. On paper, this seems like a reasonable way to ensure the reliability of the product. In practice, it is a miserable burden and you probably won’t even get…

Dirty, disgusting, filthy, lice-ridden boids.

Look up in the sky! It’s a bird! It’s hundreds of thousands of birds! What are all these birds doing with my patio umbrella? And why do they all collectively believe that “scrappiness” is a good example of a corporate value? More »

The "No, But" Engineer

When you’re improvising a comedy scene, the golden rule is to respond with “yes, and” to everything your partners say and do. This unwavering acceptance can produce riotous bouts of laughter. In an engineering team, it just creates unholy messes. More »

The Ideal Candidate Will Be Punched In the Stomach

The description suggests that this is some kind of extended metaphor about work. It appears to be written in that Choose Your Own Adventure style second-person voice, yet there are no choices to be found within. Against your better judgment, you follow the lin…

An Unwilling Participant in Your Smart Fantasy

And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, where none of the light switches do a damn thing. And you may ask yourself, “How do I work this?” And you may ask yourself, “Am I right, am I wrong?” Same as it ever was. More »

The Mannheim Steamroller Version of "Deck the Halls" Is Insufferable and I Will Fight Anyone Who Disagrees

Join me on a brief foray into one of mankind’s most disreputable pastimes: Attempting to analyze and critique Christmas music. Today’s subject is “Deck the Halls” as performed by Mannheim Steamroller. You know, the 80s synthesizer version with that bad note in…

Large Chainsaw Model

The powered chainsaw was developed nearly a century ago. Its rise in prevalence has fundamentally changed the shape of human work in forestry and logging industries. But when was the last time you personally needed to use a chainsaw in your daily life? More »

The Fake Fixation

Twenty years ago, it was not difficult to find songs that used the word “fake” somewhere in the lyrics. This is not nearly as prevalent in music today, nor was it all that common before that era. This article explores the phenomenon to try to see if there’s re…

This is [my dead grandmother]'s special day!

Everybody has their own unique way of processing and dealing with grief. There’s not really any right or wrong way to do it. Except for Google Calendar—they are absolutely doing it wrong. More »

Tangentially, we can fix your raycaster.

A detailed look at a few different sources of visual distortion that commonly occur when developing a raycaster. Covers fish eye distortion, projection plane angle distortion, and outlines a technique to disentangle the rendered wall height from the screen’s a…

The Lesser 2024 Olympics Rankings

Depending on how you interpret the numbers, you can make any country come out on top. More »

The Network Time Protocol: What Times Are It?

An exploration of the Network Time Protocol (NTP) message format, the interpretation of each of its data fields, and the underlying variables that time servers track to keep their clocks accurate. More »

ScottSmitelli.com

This is the website you are currently looking at. More »

Small WebGL Examples

Drawing onto a element doesn’t need as much code as online tutorials and example pages might lead you to believe. This page contains a handful of demos that show exactly what you need and almost nothing that you don’t. More »

The Hidden Worlds of the Klein Tools TI250 Thermal Imager

A deep dive into hidden data encoded in the BMP files saved by the Klein Tools TI250 thermal imager. More »

Cosmodoc

The semi-complete teardown of Cosmo’s Cosmic Adventure (1992). More »

Cosmore

A reconstruction of the source code of Cosmo’s Cosmic Adventure (1992), using the original C compiler and x86 assembler from 1988. More »

Langolier

A utility that removes tweets from Twitter after they reach a specified age. Because nothing good ever came from a ten-year-old tweet. More »

Windowbox

Windowbox is a photo-hosting website where I post pictures directly from my phone camera. More »

Salt

The configuration management code that automatically built this web server and everything running on it. More »